Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
