i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
