is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Randomize