I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
