Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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