he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize