I don't think brook has ever known best
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
