Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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