nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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