Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
