since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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