So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
