My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Less talking, more tequila
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
