arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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