he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
So apparently I’m into choking now
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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