been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I have already put on my inside pants.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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