Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
