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• (802): View more from Vermont

  he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.

  (1-802): View more from Vermont

  it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round

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• (714): View more from California

  I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.

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• (813): View more from Florida

  I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him

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• (801): View more from Utah

  She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information

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• (917): View more from New York City

  I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.

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• (310): View more from California

  How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?

  (323): View more from California

  Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.

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• (949): View more from California

  The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.

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