hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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