sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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