that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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