Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I can't turn off my feet"
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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