I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
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