I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I think your dad took our porno
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize