you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
