and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
