Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I can't turn off my feet"
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize