watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
