I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
