Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Randomize
