i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
