Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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