Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
