when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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