i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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