when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize
