dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
