I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
