with your own penis?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
