You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
lol hangovers are for mortals.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
