That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
