how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
