alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
