I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Randomize
