you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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