Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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