you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
