It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
