she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
