i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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